I probably shouldn’t be sharing this with you, as it can be easily classified as too much information. I’m going to share anyway because I’ve been whining about it all day to anyone who would listen, which is pretty much just the Modern Beau, and I feel like I should spread the love around.
I have a serious tush injury, and the pain is keeping me from thinking of any other thing to write about today.
The MB and I took an impromptu trip to see his parents for the day for a late celebration of his birthday. After dinner, we were sitting around watching basketball when I fielded a phone call from my dad. Opting for a little privacy, I went up a rarely used back stairwell to talk to him.
The stairwell was piled with stuff — boxes, dog toys, books, etc. Heading up the stairs wasn’t too hard, especially for someone whose had enough hiking experience on rocky ground.
Decending the mount o’ junk was another story. Somewhere between a stack of boxes and a pile of clothes I lost my footing. I caught myself from falling when my right butt cheek hit the pointy edge of the handrail and dug in.
The ensuing bruise can be described the following ways*:
- It feels like someone took a good, hard pinch and hasn’t let go for 24 hours.
- It also feels like I have a tumor growing on my tush.
- It’s the color of an eggplant and the size of my fist.
- It looks like a tattoo … of a supernova.
*None of which are exaggerations. I have an eyewitness.
The moral of this story is that a modern gal should have better sense than to try to get around a pile of junk on a stairwell: just move it.
Ouch! That should make for an un-fun workweek.
I tripped over a dog and down a flight of stairs almost two years ago, all while talking on the phone. I never missed a beat in the conversation, but later found out that I’d sprained one ankle and broke the other. I landed on my knees; they were a rainbow of colors. The dog walked away uninjured and unaware that anything had happened.
OMG. OOOOOOWWWWWW.
Feel better. Ice? Drugs? Pillows to sit on?
I’m sorry about your toosh. Hope it feels better soon!
I once fell down my stairs, and it made sitting painful for a few days. I also bruised it once on the spigot of my tub, and the bruise was impressive, but impossible to show off and be decent at the same time. That’s the extent of my serious butt injuries. I hope you’re feeling better soon!
Erica: I love hearing other funny injury stories. I have a similar one involving an ankle sprain, though alcohol was a factor too.
Noodles: I’m going drug-free in this one and opting to whine instead. Fortunately it’s high enough that I can sit in such a way that I’m not fully sitting on the bruise.
Jenn: Thanks! My bruise is minor in comparison to the pain you’re going through right now, so you feel better!
Noelle: This too is my dilemma. I want to take a photo just to show how ridiculous this bruise is, but that’s beyond where I’ve drawn the line of decency. Writing about it, however, is not.
Oh man, a butt injury? At least it wasn’t your tailbone or your back. Bruises are bad, but broken is worse.
Oh, it’s so awful when you can’t sit down comfortably. I broke my tailbone several years ago and not being able to get comfortable while sitting is just so awful.
I hope you feel better soon!
Oh, I so feel for you! It sounds painful and irritating. Hopefully it goes away quickly.
NPW: Agreed, I was very fortunate.
Allie and Vanessa: Thanks! I’m fine though … It’s more amusing than painful at this point.
It seems like the pain has passed, but I still highly recommend ice. I took a fall one week at curling and landed full-force on the pointy handle of a 45-pound rock, and sitting on a bag of ice saved my behind from eternal pain.
Jay: I just did a double take, did you say curling? As in the Olympic sport curling? Can you show me how to play?
Wow…what a story to share with all your faithful readers. Can’t say that I have the guts to divulge that I am often clumsy to the masses. You get definite props for that one.